Thursday, November 13, 2014

Blythe Love Confession

Pocket with a literal white flag of surrender...
These last few months have been really difficult for me. I switched from working part time and being at home with my daughter to working a full time job with an hour commute each way. I had what I thought were just transition pains at the beginning, and now at six months and counting, I have found that I am still not happy.

Most nights I come home, make dinner, struggle to stay awake long enough to put my pre-schooler to bed, and then collapse into bed myself, often around 8:30pm. I used to be up until at least midnight. I used to have a ton of TIME. If I didn't get dolly time during the day, I would get it after bedtime...well, no more. Now I get up at 4:30am and don't get home until 5pm at the earliest. I have a precious three and a half hours until my body gives up and flies the white flag of surrender and we sleep. It doesn't leave a lot of time for dolls and it definitely doesn't leave much energy for creativity. This is not really my preferred life style...

And then I thought, "Oh no. This is how it happens. I stop taking pictures, I stop playing, I stop caring about my dolls...and then I start wondering why I bought them to begin with...and I sell them all off one by one and write something in the sales post like, 'leaving the hobby'" I NEVER want that to be me. I don't honestly think it ever will be...

Don't worry, girls, I couldn't ever part with ANY of you!
I am currently doing my second 365 with Pocket (third overall) and I refuse to quit. I fall behind constantly and there are a lot of nights that I can't even imagine taking a photo at all.
  • I fall over three days behind and you can only post three photos per day
  • Pocket wears the same outfit and often has the same gaze day after day
  • Most photos are in my 'doll room' or if I am feeling really ambitious, another room in the house.
But here's the thing. When I do take a photo it feels good. Even when it is just a close up of Pocket's face. Haha.

When I sit calmly and root through dolly outfits and re-dress the girls, it is really therapeutic. I feel super peaceful, and it seems to re-charge my batteries. I feel as though it centers me.

And sometimes, on special evenings, I have a little burst of creativity and wind up with a really cool photo, like this one of Pocket and Darcy carving pumpkins. :)

Even when I don't take an amazing photo, or any photos, I look at my girls before I collapse into bed, and I am happy. I especially love seeing Pocket and our newest girl, Darcy. I almost can't help hugging them and planting a little kiss on their foreheads whenever I look at them. I love them. They are such happy thoughts that I could never be without them.


  1. I totally agree with you about missing special dolly time after a long day - at times, I'm just content to hold my Ffrigg with her big, round head under my chin and I'm suddenly calm (she can be very grounding).

    1. I do that too! Their little (big) heads fit perfectly there for a hug and it feels very comforting!